Tomorrow, or rather, today, is the sophomore pin dance, and I shall be attending.

Should be interesting.

nikkerz403: tell her she sucks
nikkerz403: i personally have come to a point in my life where i have no more patience for shit like that
nikkerz403: leigh started pissing me off so i kciked her out of my life

And I had an extremely interesting day/night, but I am far too exhausted to even begin to regail my tale (?!) so I will go to bed now. Yes. Bed. Stories tomorrah.

I did well today with tennis, just my arm hurts a whole lot. I really wish she wasn't making as many cuts as she is, because there are people that I know are going to be cut that I'd like to see stay. It sucks, but I've done all I can about it. I do think the season will go well though, at least I hope so. I also hope that the weather learns to not suck so much, I'm tired of playing in 20 degree cold and/or rain. It isn't that much fun.

Other than that, nothing new or interesting. I let some people listen in on my "demo", and the response has been good overall, I think. I still don't think I'll play for anybody any time soon. Some people don't think it's me at all, which kind of hurts, but I don't blame them I guess. I don't seem like the type to do anything good. Maybe I'll just come out of my shell sooner or later and give some proof. Who knows.

I'm not in the best mood to be completely honest. I made the promise to always be there, and I've kept it. I am always there. It sucks that doesn't go both ways.

And I quote, "thank you for being the closest person to me that i'd like to say i can hate for saying all of those things about me. but i can't and i dont honestly know why, but i can't i love you more than anytning and you know that. i hope you do."

I don't know. And I think that you're a liar. And I think that was such a cheap bullshit response, and the easiest way out of it at the time. And I think that you chose your words carefully enough to avoid my calling you out on it. And I think that actions speak louder than words. And I think that I'm through for good this time. And I think that you'll be happy about that.

You're welcome.

Well, I ended up staying up to finish the Elvis thing, which I think came out beautifully. The thing is, yesterday's freezing cold tennis made me a very sick Kristin, so I stayed home. :(

Right now I'm feeling better because of the meds I have, and I'm contemplating going to tennis tryouts or not just to observe, because I know I can't play. We'll see.. oh yeah! I think I have a pin dance dress now (finally). The source being my wonderful mother, and I think it's hysterical, but we'll see.

Okay, there was no need for that update, but I did it anyway. Byebye now.

Well, quite a bit has happened these past few days. Set aside I got into college, and I can actually speak about it without getting overly excited, tennis has begun, and I got myself in the "studio" to record a few songs.

As for school, all is well I suppose. I'm getting extremely lazy and I really need to snap out of it. I need to write this paper on Elvis and I didn't even start it. It's one of those, "Well this is so easy I don't want to write about it," kind of situations. You know how those go..

Tryouts started today. I think somewhere around 22 girls showed up, which is awesome because we have a lot of people to look at, but horrible because there are going to be cuts. After talking with Dina and Ms. Mata, we all decided that 14 to 15 would be the magic number for the team. I really don't want to get rid of some people but it really isn't my choice. I feel bad about it...

It was absolutely freezing, too. Not even kidding. Like 20 degrees out, plus the wind, which was equally as harsh. Not your typical tennis weather. Not only could we not feel our hands or breathe, the ball was being blown all over the place. Hopefully tomorrow will be better temperature-wise, or else I'll end up being more sick than I already am.

I couldn't do the whole run today, which was absolutely pathetic and embarassing. I hate the fact that I can't run and keep up with everybody because I get so dizzy and I can't breathe. The cold I think really made the asthma act up. I kept wheezing and had underclassmen making sure I was okay. That's horrible, because I'm supposed to be captain and I should be able to hold my own. I'd do anything to be able to run, it sucks that I can't, as much as I act like I'm happy I don't have to.

Overall I think the season will go really well. I hope me and Allison place high in the SWC tournament. That's my biggest goal. I want to not only maintain my record from last season, but improve it. We'll see how that goes.

As for recording, I had a "session" the other day, got put on a crappy cd, and ripped everything to the computer. As to whether or not anyone will hear it, that's another story haha. It's all just Kristin and her guitar, not very impressive or exciting, but I tried. All three songs were written a long time ago, and I don't think I pulled them off very well, but we'll see what other people say if I actually get over this fear of letting people hear me perform. I need a good push in the right direction haha. I'm just so incredibly afraid of failure and not living up to my expectations, it prevents me from doing much of anything. I don't believe I've ever put 100% effort into anything that I have ever done, because if I do that and it isn't good enough, then I know I can never do any better. I'm not sure how much sense that made, but that's pretty much the jist of what goes through my head.

Sorry about that tangent, I won't do it ever again ;)

Wait, screw you, this is my journal, haha. And why won't people ever talk shit here or on my fotki page? That was the whole point of the fotki page, it's no fair, only the popular people get crazy fights :( Oh well, haha. Maybe I'm just that lovable! Yay! Just kidding...

It's 12:15 now, and I think I'll go to bed and wake up at maybe 3 or 4 to do this project for Mr. Roberts. I hope that works out the way I want it to. Please please pleaaaaseeeee. And I miss you already Mike, I love you. :(